Reminiscing helps me get rid of the depression.
Apparently, the week after my Geography camp-out was “Valentines’ Week”. As usual, love was all around the campus–vendors selling flowers, boys carrying cakes and chocolates, and so you know the rest. Since I did not have anything to do for Valentines’ Day itself, I bought tickets for the Valentines’ Day concert in school, two tickets to be exact. Since my best friend was going to the concert with his girlfriend, and I felt like I would be the third wheel, I decided to buy two tickets, having a spare ticket for my other best friend. So I asked this other best friend of mine if he would like to come with me to the concert since he is a fun guy and all, but then he told me that he already had a ticket and he would be spending that evening with his Geography classmates. I felt like I would be all alone on that day, so I looked for someone who would like to come with me. Since she was the only person I was texting for the past week, besides my ‘brothers’, and she ‘owned’ my inbox, I texted her, asking if she would like to come with. She replied, telling me that she was not sure yet, but most likely she would go with me. Well that was a relief, I mean, finally we could hang out, outside from the four walls of the ROTC quadrangle, and I would have someone to be with me on the concert day.
So Valentines’ Day came, and I was actually expecting that she would be going with me (and I had ‘dating clothes’ aka polo in my bag) but I was also ready for the possibility that she would not be going, either because she would not be allowed by her parents since the concert would be late at night, or because she had better plans with her guy. While on the jeep to the train station, my best friend called, asking if I could wait for him and for our other friend at the train’s second station so we could go to school together; I said yes, and so I rode the train and went down the second station, and traveled with them to school. We arrived at school at 8 A.M., and I had no first subject class that day (which was Math by the way; I guess my prof had a date? HAHA) and I asked the two if they wanted to just hang out in the canteen. They said yes, and so we stayed there for almost two hours. We parted ways at around 10 A.M., and I went straight to the gym for my Judo class. After the class, I had to run some errands and bought a flower on the way back to school. I was thinking, Why did I buy a flower? I mean, yeah it is for her, but what if she does not accept it since it was only one piece, or since she had a boyfriend, or because she did not want to carry the flower home? So many what ifs. So I rode the train back to school, getting myself squished by the people inside the train, while at the same time protecting the pink to carnation pink ombre rose I bought for her. I was ten minutes away from school when she texted, where you at? I’ll be here at the usual kiosks where you like to hang out at. (non-verbatim) In my mind, I thought, Okay, so she is going with me. Is this for real? Suddenly, the 48 colors inside the Crayola box started exploding in my chest together with the cardboard box pack; I can feel fireworks exploding inside me! It was so confusing in a good way, whether I wanted the driver to have his jeep go faster so I would not keep her waiting, or to have him drive slower so I could gather myself.
When I got down the jeep, I had that usual battle face when walking, but I was completely unstable–I was excited and scared at the same time. Thankfully, my best friend was at the corner, waiting for a jeep. He asked me where I bought the flower, and I told him some miles away from here. Turns out, he was also in need of a flower for his girl friend. Well lucky for him, there was a flower vendor at his back, he just did not use his eyes. So he bought three, and before he left, he said, Hey I stayed for almost three hours at the kiosks, wala lang. Oh and yeah, she is waiting for you at the kiosks. (non-verbatim.) And so, the fireworks came back,with an additional 12 pieces of crayons. The kiosks were less than a hundred steps from where I got down from the jeep, and I was taking my time walking, trying to decipher how to approach her, and how to give her the flower, since it would be the first time we would be having a casual conversation personally. I saw her sitting, with her back facing me. She was wearing a navy blue top, and her long curly hair all over. I really did not know how to do it the right way (in Tagalog, natorpe ako), so I just walked in front of her, said Hi, sorry I kept you waiting, and gave her the flower. I was surprised because she accepted the flower with a big smile, and I was glad because she took it happily. She also told me that it was the first time she received a flower; I was shocked, I mean, why does your guy not give you flowers? So we had our talks, she was getting to know me more, while I got myself giving into her more. While the conversations got longer, the more she kept checking the time, whether on her phone or on my watch. I asked her why, and she said that she had to meet him because he had prepared something special for her, since it was Valentines’ Day, and since he was her guy. I did not know what to do! I did not want her to leave, because I had myself falling in love more and more, and what if she does not come back for the concert? In my life, I had given up many opportunities, loved the wrong person, had the worst friends, and I knew she is the perfect fit in my life, and I did not want to let that opportunity go, so desperate times called for desperate measures! I did my best to stall her–hide the time from her, keep my watch and phone hidden, and held on to her phone so she would not leave. Her guy started calling, and she did not pick up even a single call. I then felt that she did not want to leave my side anymore, so she asked for a solution, for an excuse. I told her the best excuse I have been using in my life (kids, please do not use this), I told her to text him, saying that her mom suddenly decided to celebrate Valentines’ Day by having dinner outside. So she did text him, and he took that excuse like it was flawless and valid. (Man I am great!) So we continued talking, and for four hours of just sitting there at the kiosks, I felt like I had already shared most of the stories of my life, and it felt like I had already known her for so long.
…To be continued.
youandmechronicles 